The WriTer* in Me!
31/12/2003
Reflections
Family : hmm.. i haven't been a good grand-daugther/ daugther / sister.. hmm.. not at home most of the time. SIgh. .
Studies: OK i studied REAL HARD .. that is juz a couple of weeks b4 the exam la i admit.. hmm i think i got the results i wanted. BUT not good enough.. shouldn't juz sprint at the end.. haha.. too tiring.. no bao3 zhang4!actually .. this time .. quite lucky.. those things that i spot came out.. haha and got hard working pple to motivate me to study.. and all the coffee and stuff.. but.. my SS!!! argghH!
Friends:
Think i've been quite swt and nice this year!! haha yea..hmm and haha basically this year.. caused much trouble for myself in this area.. haha think too much.. mabbe imbalance of hormones? haha.. dun know.. but there was one incident that made me very depressed for half a year or so.. haha LONG process. yea.. and 2 very important pple walked deep into my life. hhaa.. sooo.. thankful to have them!
NP: Great shift of roles this year. Hope we are coping ok. alot of stuff can be improved.. really alot.. quite alot of regrets.. sigh. Din go for ATC[ny].. tsk.. sigh.. missed out quite abit. oh.. OM was very memorable.. though it's seem as if it's ages ago.that period.. all the quarells and stuff.. made me love and hate some pple to the core. wah... so much memories.. rmb all the funny tricks we try to do.. staying in sch.. messing up dong dong.hah.. the trophy.. seems so far away.. very far... ha.. will nv get to feel it again. but nvm. pah.. the new roles.. are indeed challenging.. admit that i was once taken aback.. by the workload.. but.. thanx to sqmate's help.. all things are made possible.
council: SLC was great learning experience. very impt part of this year.. for me. had loads of fun.. knew lots of pple.. haha.. especially chairing the general assembly.. scarry.. some pple critisize.. but.. it feels quite warm.. when i go to the washroom and pple sae.. jiayoux.. u are doing GREAT... esp.. they are pple i dunno. haha..
did many projects and proposals but they are either of no use.. or got rejected.. quite a down year.. like nothing's been done
got into EXCo.. met wif lots of stress.. promised to leave a legacy.. set high dreams
council camp.. hhaa memorable.. unforgetable..
hmm when i wanted another section on other commitments.. i found that i have nothing else.. haha.. wonder what will happen to my life.. without being in NY.. NP.. NYSC.. and of course.. without my family and all my dearest frenz.. wah.. life will be TOTALLY different.. and i bet it wldn't be as enjoyable.. for all the pple who knoe me and i know u.. hha.. juz to sae.. u made my life!
Review on major projects / workload 2003
NOv'02 - June'03 SLC
Jan'03 - Apr'03 OM
[wah.. wad else did i do for the year ah? seems so little!!]
Jul'03 POP
Art fest
Aug'03 NDP
Sep'03 HOrizon
Teacher's DAy
Oct'03 post rotation
Nov'03 SLTC
Study!
WEP
Farewell
Council Camp
Dec'03 CT
invest
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30/12/2003
1 last CC practice in the hols tml. jiayOUX!
ok..i'm gonna be SO 2 faced.. oh precious!!.. gah
Yea! i din hit myself todae! but quite lan4 la.. my pitches.
yea.. nothing much these days..
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27/12/2003
Hmm in the morning had AGM.. wah.. Long and draggy.. pah.. but had a great time laughing and crapping during "slack time" bwahhaa. Quote someone "there's a limit to what 2 gals can do together and 2 guys can do together"..no offence haha but i had a great laugh. Can't reveal much here.. yup
ok.. then went back to CC trg.. pitch once and go for lunch..then back to sec 4 council mtg.. then at tt EXCO mtg. then back to trg. hmm yea.. feel quite bad today.. cauz like for most of the nice pitches.. it's not me lo.. then it's like i feel that i drag the whole flag thing down. dunno why also leh. sigh. have to nu li more lah.. lagging behind.. tsk.. ahhh !!what happened?!tsk.. it's very depressing lo.. tsk.. haiz.
Oh i guess i know the indications of my night mare liao.. the one featuring a pool of blood and floating foetus..it means that i will lose lots of blood maybe.. haha. think i have to go fully armoured.tsk.. still think that todae's performance is not up to my expectation.. ahhh.. SUan4 le4.. themore i think.. the more depressed i feel.
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26/12/2003
anw.. i feel that time is running out.. and i m still left with 234897325 892 pieces of hw~! grr.. nvm. Spent my whole christmas doing hw. Oh.. haha and for some weird reasons, i felt like making tang yuan on christmas day.. [dun ask me why] ahha.. yea.. then went NTUC and bought the flour.. and really MADe tangyuan!! haha in all sorts of shapes.. heart..round.. square.. shit shape.. firey shape.. christmas tree shape.. hahah.. yea.. then boiled em with ginger+sweet potato soup. YUmmY!! haha.. yea brought some for teammates todae.. at least pple recognise my efforts.. hee=) NICE!!!!
YEAH!!! i set new record for whipping!! 10. 72 sec!!!b4 tt my personal best was 13.6 k?? ahaha. Oh.. then exchanged presents [flag peggers] i got vivien m's gift.. a toe ring i suppose.. haha chao nice. hmm wad else.. juz rmbed tt sihui was super HIGH todae.. kept bickering w me leh. and bwahhaha ChaiLING dui1 lian3 wahahh wahhhhaahahhahaha!!!! it's been a very long time since i laughed like dat!!! thanks chailing!! yong4 xin1 liang2 ku3!~~
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24/12/2003
OK.. for this once i hate ohjoelyn for passing down a toopid Xmas message. ARggHH.. so malu-ing!!! can't stop laughing lo. YOU BETTA WATCH OUT!gah -_-||
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23/12/2003
anw todae's pitch very exciting.. haha 1st pitch only.. it was downpour.. sudden downpur.. haha then before the pitch pple are FREEZING already.. then all very excited cauz we can't wait to enter and finish the pitch.hhah.anw every thing was done quite fast cauz everyone is very cold and wanna get out of the pitch.. budden when i raised the flag.. i cannot even see if the flag has been fully raised.. rain drops kept going into my eyes.. gahh
yea then aft tt it's like.. sunny.. rainy.. sunny rainy.. sunny and rainy again.. grr.the last pitch was good.. haha we broke our record! yea.. NY Campcraft Team..jiayoUx!!
oh.. morning was registration.. hah yea.. slack.. had lots of fun too!!CHiwaaawaa!!!!!!!hhaaaaa.i once told charmaine "how i wish i can record my voice down and juz rewind and play.. rewind and play" haha.. cauz i kept repeating the same thing to the parents [where to register.. wad time come dwn wadsoeva]haha then came up wif a slackers gang
slacker - XL
slacker slacker - Huiz
slacker head - flo
slacker slakcer head- charmaine
slackest slacker head - me
slacker gang - the PSl and councillors on the 2nd lv classrms -_-
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22/12/2003
then aft tt 15min yucky pitch [for me] went back and pack up and PAH.. 8 SMS waiting for me to reply!!4 council invest stuff*tears the proposal*, 3 parents [scolding me woah] and 1 from joelyn's father.. i nearly scream my head off man..
ok now my right index finger is officially disfigured - a orh-ceh nail..a blister [intact]at the knuckle and a bleeding blister near my palm.. death cells refusing to tear off at the other knuckle.
ok.. enough of gross stuff haha.. think my finger looks quite cool now =p.. eh.. indications tt i am clumsy but at the same time i tried my best k? hha anyway.. MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE.. oh.. haha and enjoy ur tang1 yuan2.. todae.. if u remmeber.. it's dong1 zhi4.
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21/12/2003
anw sazpdy apdy zu yrzwrt fitomh yjr vszqvtsgy ytsomomh..haha yjrm o dsof dzyj brtu dwlru.. ha yjrm drv yjtrrd hpy s djpvl m yjpy er hpy dpzryjomh etpmh jsj.
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18/12/2003
anyway.. trging again todae. feel like it is very DRAGGY.. like very long lo. nvm haha. i think HO very zai!! wah.. hee=) GOod JOB!! 10:14 yo! haha 10 min cut!! not bad. keep the spirit burning!! oh.. muz remember to refuel!! haha.. looking foward to a more.. exiciting day tml!! haha somehow.. o grra yjsy yjr apdy dqotoy pg pit dw od nsvl..zoddrf oy dp zivj..jsp koi zro upi xjr zr djismh ar
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17/12/2003
Oh then also went to XSLC Combined mtg. din even prepare wad to sae.. juz crap there. haha heng dawei came and tokked some sense. ok la.. can see the liviness in LPP again.. as crazee as US!!! IXSLC OT!!! yea!!! Eh.. any OT reading.. let's have PARTY each at eavery year's IXSLC anniversary.. haha the day of general assembly!!
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16/12/2003
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12/12/2003
I did it in 28 seconds.
I deserved a B!!
Take the How Dexterous Are You? Quiz
Sigh.. had a talk with my Ma the other day..juz recalled and decided to blog today. She cried.. i nearly did. It's abt my commitments. sigh.. i think i put too much efforts in sch stuff already.. studies.. NP.. DALT.. COUNCIL.. CT.. sigh and i sort of neglected my family. Yes i know im in the wrong. but nothing seems to keep me like.. putting in alot of effort for the family. i mean.. even if i am at home.. i do nothing.. and i think it doesn't make a difference if i am at home or not. In the beginning.. i kept questioning.. like whether she knows what my commitments r and why dun she support me and i let me follow my heart. i thought it's my right to do what i want.. but i think i am wrong. for the family.. both my parent sacrificed ALOT. my ma.. she dares not go anywhere other than office hours juz for the family. Cna't go out with fwrens.. no social activities.. no vaccation no hols.. juz for the family. My dad.. though i alwaez complain that he's not at home and alwaez use tt reason to rebutt him when he saes i've not be contributing to my family much.. he works VERY hard.. always thinking of ways to make more money. 3hrs+ of slp each day.seems as if.. EVERYTHING they do.. is for the family. I am too.. juz that i see my SCHOOL as my family. Wrong focus i should sae.but it's hard for me to change now. IF there is really one thing in my christmas wish list.. it's a scholarship award at the end of Sec 4. To lighten my parent's load.. to be able to secure a job at the end of uni.. and to make their job easier. It hurts me to see my ma crying.. when i m the one who made her cry. she was like saying.. it's impossible for my family to send me for the various sessions like dialysis if my kidneys really fail..and they can't apply for any aid cauz their salary looks like it's alot.. but the expenses for my family is very HIGH too. my sick grandpa.. my maid.. tuition and stuff for my bro.. my youngest bro's medical fees.. and the medicine i'm taking everyday.. have to replenish like once every 3 weeks.. cost like 100+++ everytime.
I really really dunno how to balance. though i seem to be able to balance sch work.. np and council.. i can't seem to put family in.. though it matters to me..a lot.
I can't seem to back out on my sch commitments now.. since i am already in it.. and seriously i dun have extra energy to put in ALOT for my family. use to think passion and faith can make everything possible.. now i know.. there are restrictions to everything. now i think.. wadeva i believed in in the past.. is so naive.. HAHa... but it still makes some sense leh.. aiya complex!
anw yea.. shuo1 wan2 le. sigh. i will figure this out sooner or later. guess i will really have to work extra hard to fufil my christmas wish list. esp w pple like .. dor koh.. hupan and other SMAAART ppl arnd. Lots of pressure actually.
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11/12/2003
It was raining right from the start..haha. oh and i got my team shoe.. from North Star..haha. Ok.. got a feeling i'll fall sick real soon. in the rain + sore throat and stuff.. At 8 i went off for COuncil Sec 4 mtg.. had a long and draggy discussion and later on went to meet mrs vivien chan..again yet another dready mtg.but quite funny la.. with all the lame comments and stuff. At 11.. can't wait to plunge downstairs for the CC training. so i left early..leaving them to discuss something that i regret not participating in..
Back to campcraft plot and found all the 7 of them looking very depressed. hmm.. apparently the trainers said something veri demoralising..tried to reassure everyone though i din know what's happening la. ok then wen back to pitch at the plot. Qutie wet and muddy cauz it's drizzling. then for subsequent pitches.. the plot became more and more MUDDY and STINKY yeeeek.. think we all STINK. and believe me.. my Peg get burried in the mud and i seriously CANNOT find it juz by looking. and the whole plot is flooded to abt 5 cm in depth. downright yucky. haha.. but had lots of fun in the rain and mud --> brought us closer i guess..as a team.
then the rain got bigger aft lunch so vivien m taught us some knots.. then specialisation for me on ABU.hee=) for 2 m ABu .. successfully cut my timing from..2min 02 s to 51 s. wah..
AFt the last pitch.. had a had time clearing up. All the mud ont he eqiupments + our bodies.oh 4got to mention. weina m was playing arnd haha and she aimed a ball of mud on my HEAd when i was releasing the clove hitch. Concussion liao~Aft all the washing [think we wasted 5 gallons of water].. haha joelyn suggested to wait for her father to bring disposables [all the undergarments are soaked in mud can?] haha.. ok that is one thing we will remember as NYCT 04 ..according to sihui.. haha..
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09/12/2003
GradNIte
I was anticipating since the end of council camp.. cauz it sounds so fun. hAHA.. before the gradnite, they had a farewell lunch for chuwen [i juz saw her training in sch tt morning lo]. The meeting time was 1..but i got CC practice.. so can't go. Quite sad la. anw haha.. CC practice was fun tt day.. especially the imaginary pitch.. haha.. LmAO. Okok.. then aft tt at 5+ i rinsed myself in sch and rushed to Sheraton towers. Wah..felt real tired during the bus trip lo. It's not exactly very long to take bus from sch to newton MRT.. but for some reasons.. i fell asleep and actually had a complete dream of some adventure -_-. OK.. then being super ulu in tt area.. i studied the map outside the MRT station for like 5min b4 knowing tt sheraton towers is juz by the road. cannot blame me.. veh tired. nvm.. yea.. then i dragged myself up to the room and plunge down onto the soft and comfy bed of the 5 star hotel.tt was heavenly.. BUT pple kept waking me up.. grrr.. i juz wANNA SLP! ok anw..quite shocked tt somepple look very different in their retro outfits. hhaa.. esp flo. canot even recognise her. Anw.. after sometime, with much reluctance.. went to change to my long sleeve shirt with a butterfly knot + bell bottom + silver necklace + a bangle from the 1950s+ golden chain belt+ black singlet inside. ok.. this are a few comments i rmb "u look like a guy from neck to the top and a woman from neck and below" "Are u a guy or a girl?" "Finally u look so feminine" Well.. THANKYOU for e compliments.hhaha. Arggh then b4 i went down.. wanted to style my hair a lil. BUT a bunch of sec 3s [4] took the hairspray from my hands and like.. SPRAY SPRAY SPRAY and RUFFLE RUFFLE RUFFLE... Arhhhh!!my HAIR.. then when my hair FROZE there.. i look as if i juz woke up or something lor. damn punk. think i look for some hei1 she4 hui4 da4 jie3 da4. haha. Then for some reason or another.. pple started being curious abt wad i was wearing INSIDE. AND then they touch here touch there.. haha wondering why my blouse has netting and holes but they can't see wad's inside. piang then i was like "protecting" myself and syl juz tried to attack from behind and i am on the bed and she's like on top of me?!:s hahaha..my 2nd time.. aft the encountance with selene yeo.
Yep yep.. then down we go to the ballroom. it was so GRAND and high class lo. oh.. then saw lots of snrs there.haha.. dressed quite fancifully. then the dinner started aft we ushered the pple into the ballroom. YUMMY!!! ALL my favourites leh. BBQ chicken..sliced beef..chilli prawn+ ee mian..potato wedge.. crabstick..YUM YUM. yea.. then i got saboed by siting..*sob* there goes my face. yea and some funny games are carried out and blah blah blah till 10++ and the disco started. OK.. my 1st time in DISCO atmosphere.. haha quite cool. It was as if i had estacy man.. kept dancing and dancing and jumping and shaking and rocking and playing and fooling arnd.. nv exhausted liddat leh.. haha.ya.. damn high..enjoyed "letting loose abit" especially of all the stress from hw and SC and NP.. phew. All in all it was a crazee rocking party man.hah..and they[Xl, HuiX, Dani, Yuqin] attempt to rape me!!! i was complaining i feel warm and stuff.. then they saw my singlet and threaten to pull my long sleeve off lor.. haha.. i DIE also hold on man.hahahaa... had so much fun. Oh but aft tt was horrible. like.. suddenly out of the music and the hype.. felt damn tired.. lost and uncomfortable lo. haha. BUT .. i will really enjoy thenite if i were a graduating sec 4.. really a great and unforgettable night. GOOD JOB gradnite com!! haha. then i left at abt 12am aft giving everyone a hug..nearly collaspe when i was hugging syl cauz i was too tired.. haha.
CC practice 4
YEA!!! we BROKe the 10 min barrier!!! fastest record..9:48 min. WOOOOOOOOHOOO!!! haha can really see evryone smiling aft tt pitch lo. WE can DO IT NYCT'04!!haha..and yea.. seriosuly the whoel team is improving.. skills wise.. energy level wise.. and communication wise. keep it up!! yawn. hah.. then went off at abt 4pm todae to buy equipments la.. Tml will be another full day!! OH.. 4got to mention.. I HATE shopping..especially going into the SAME SHOP AGAIN and AGAIN.. and still cannot decide whether to buy is or not. I mean HELLO.. make up ur mind!! WASTE TIME LEH!!!!
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07/12/2003
Oh something abt the CC practice on.. 4th. I had to lower the flag.. then halfway it was stuck in between the poles. then i yong4 li4 la1.. and *ssssssssss* it tore!!!! school flag leh.. OMG. lOser. haha have to sew it together. problem is i dunno how.. and the thread isn't of the lan4 quality cloth.. die liao la. Oh.. then i hammer my fingers.. using the mallet. OUCH.. got orh-ceh.
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06/12/2003
Green
You are a very calm and contemplative person. Others are drawn to your peaceful, nurturing nature.
Find out your color at Quiz Me!
*really meh???*
You're the cheerful smile,the one that's truly
happy with almost everything you do and would
never change your life.
What Kind of Smile are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Council Camp
Gathered at the audi feeling really latargic. SLTC juz ended 2 days ago and CT selection was the day before. Really really tired and i din think i could survive through the whole camp. I think i was the 3rd Sec4 there.. aft Syl and Huix. Ok..then went to prepare first aid kit for qinghan and saw many many camp instructors that apparently DIAO me.fine.. i thought cauz it was suppose to have tt kinda tone. yup. OK then waiting for serveral pple to turn up..late [bound to have 1 or 2 each camp one la].Yup then did some punishments..20pushups i think for tt. One thing i like abt the CCC is they make sure we know wad we do certain things for. Always having the rationale and explaining them to us clearly [although sometimes the rationales are abit too..off..haha but they manage to phrase it quite nicely that at that instant..u will feel as if it is the utmost truth.]
First activity of the day : vertical limits. Supposed to arrange our chairs in a circle then ly down [reminds me of farewell..sec2's item] and the instrcutors will pull the chair away and we are supposed to hang for very long. At first our group din manage to do it.. cauz the position was always WRONG.haha then as a result.. i suffer from terrible muscle ache at the thigh when everyone was lying down comfortably. Then we moved on to doing it as a Batch. WOoot Sec4s ROCK!!! haha we hang on for like 5+min when our aim was 2.5min.hee hee so proud of ourselves. Then we were supposed to do it as a whole council..did so much planning.. yadayada..discussed..but still we din manage to hold on for very long.I reckon it's because pple do not force themselves to hold on longer.. like a lil bit aching here and there they want to give up already. hah. Qinghan's words was demoralising -"no more second chances". Bu4 Fu2 Qi4.
Second activity- Cleaning! trainers said we were playing with water...but we were juz moppin the floor wad!!!anw they claim that the classrms were dirty aft going around wiping place with tissue. Try this. Right now, take a toilet paper and wipe ur desk HARD for about 15 cm of length...see wad u get..NOT A TOTALLY WHITE SHEET OF PAPER LO! ++they din really show us the paper with dirt..haha. get my point?juz saying that it's clean enough already..paff nvm. but towards the end..b4 we weer dismissed for lunch.. we left like 2 pple cleaning the whole corridor by themselves and happily waited for lunch at the atrium. Not very together as u can see. one thing to learn. And cauz of communication break down and stuff.. ppl ein different rooms have like.. different ideas of wad is supposed to be done. end up doing different stuff and got scolded. COMMUNICATION
Third - LUNCH! had chicken rice and we had to pick our warm fuzzies!!Wheee!! haha my warm fuzzies were sandy and Xizhi.. both i dunno who they are lor. ha. then the sec 4'03 introduced zhong ji mi ma as the mini game for meal time. Ok.. suei suei our grp kanna.had to gulp down a 1.5l bottle of mixture of banana+apple+soyabean drink. felt like puking yA?i drank like 3/4 of the bottle w chen yang piaing w me..and no one else wants to drink..except ..someone who kindly tried.NO BANANAS for tt day at least
Next..i think it was the traffic jam thing. We were divided in PIGs..DOGs.. and SHEEPS lik ein animal farm.PIG can do wadeva they like. Dogs have to raise hands and seek for permission b4 they speak and sheeps..cannot speak unless they are pointed to specifically.Ok ended up tt most sec4s are SHEEEPS. haha then we are very very GEKKED seeing that some of the pigs aren't contributing to solve the prob and that when we have a idea we can't sae.. it's very hard to hold back lo.and we felt kinda left out int he whole discussion. Objectives: let the seniors realise that there are alot of reasons why pple in the organisation do not or cannot speak up their views and it's their responsibility to ensure everyone has to a chance to voice out their views. I find tt very important and it's like a .. enlightenment for me. yea and the elects will try to take on leadership position lor.
Next..24!we, the whole council was supposed to complete like 24 tasks in 2 hours. [aft the debrief i got to know that even the trainers din expect us to complete all in 2 hours..haha] I volunteered to do the collage of the council pledge [i was memorising it tt morning..thinking tt something liddat will come up] and to write a long cheer. Long cheer.. i spent loads of time thinking abt it.. wanted it to have a hiphop style and rap rap rap.. haha but i think i failed to do so la.. to beautify the lyrics. But nvm mich took over and i think the cheer i came up wif did give her some inspiration.=s. yupyup then helped her with the cheer. haha somewhat rmbed syl coming up wif a line of stupid cheer: "Look who's rocking - NANYANG. Look who's whining.. NOT ME NOT ME!!!" -_-|"
This game.. pls slot in anywhere.. i can't rmb when exactly did we play it. It's called the theory game. we were given a cardboard with 'X' on one side and 'Y' on the other. Then the rule was: if all 4 grps raise 'X'.all grps get 1 point. if 3 grps raise X and 1 grp raise Y.. Y gets 3 pts and X minus 1 pt. and yada yada.. aim was to get the msot points and win. haha.. then dunno why.. right from the start we had this correct guess of the objective - that which grp wins does not matter as we are one WHOLE organisation and there is no point competing with each other + we have made promises and should not backstab others. haha.. initially when all 4 grps were like raising X all the way.. the instructors kept dropping "HINTS" on how to win. NO matter how tempted some of us maybe.. haha i told hz that we should have a jian1 ding4 li4 chang3 haha and believe in what decisions we've made. In the end.. tt perserverence paid off..hee=)clever right?
Then it was the discussion of the council vision."Leaving a legacy".. hmm.. haha my dreams.. my batch's dream. Aiming real high.. really hope we can reach it. while the sec4 batch was enthusiatically discussing future plans.. the others dun seem to be keen/interested. hmm.. it will be their turn soon.. e regret is tt i dun see the same amt of passion to council in them.
BATHE! SLEEP! but got exco mtg b4 slping. still feeling quite hyper.
Kept waking up at 2 + .. 3+.. then 4. Then i really went into slp at 4.. at 4.30 qinghan came knocking onto the door!!!! "GET UP!! BAG CHECK!! PACK ALL UR STUFF AND GATHER AT THE QUADRANGLE!" i would be blaffing u if i said i was caught by surprise. I was expecting it actually. but for some reasons i packed my stuff according to a whole SET of clothes i wear each day but what they require is that we line our stuff out according to the KIND of stuff. So natuarlly.. i took a very LONG TIME.should be more clever on tt. yea.. i surrendered my whistle. It was hanged on the twine together with my torch for SLTC. too lazy the night b4 to take it out. haha when i realise e nxt morning.. i thot it wld be good for mr lee' s farewell la.. so i din surrender on the 1st day. yea.. felt kinda guilty=S. then for the 11 "illegal" items.. had to return 110 jumping jacks. Dunno why leh.. Dani looked for me to demo the jumping jack.haha mabbe cauz of the PT sessions for SLTC.haha then for some weird reasons.. when i demoed the jumping jack or wheneva i lead PT.. i would automatically switch to 'NP MODE" haha.. like NP tone.. NP expression..NP stare. oops. haha think i was pushing my council mates like cadets.sorry if i sounded harsh.
Okie..then it was...breakfast. then aiya.. 4got liao. HUGGLE? haha in the field if tt is so. have to listen to ALINA's whistle for the correct position to be in. 1blow = lying down flat on the ground. 2 blows = push up. 3 blows = huggles. I was suffocating during huggles. Int he middle mah.. dunno why also. lucky im not very short.. can breathe the air above.haha. find gweneth real funny *evil grin*and during Cheering!!!!pple SHOUT INTO MY EAR!!!can hear my ear drums screaming for help lo.. trembling like mad!.
THen if im not wrong.. the next game is the sitting on each other laps one. Ok la tt one. had quite comfortable positions every time. Not like vertical limits. but i learnt one very important lesson - Though it's true tt one must push herself over hte limit to achieve more.. it's wrong to push TOO HARD. tsk..very ambi right.. i can't balance tt out either. sigh. then the question abt setting goals and aims. setting low aims is to satisfy urself. setting high aims that i think i won't reach do not serve a purpose as well. *pss.. applies to cc* whateva it is.. as long as it is like.. a bit higher than what u deem as "ur best" .. i think it is ok enough.
Next BeDazzled??ha boring game..dun wanna blog.. sian.but i was slping la.. sorrie lo. Can do NOThing wad.
Next MOVERS Inc. sigh . My highests and lowest points are all here. It's supposed to be a event where by all sec4s participate la. quite happy in the beginning cauz i thought the sec 4s can achieve anything with our might..haha in short.. i juz have tt trust and confidence in everyone lo. very strange feeling.. wheneva we are there.. i will believe we can do it.. some how.. thoguh it may seem impossible. haha. there is this twine..tied horizontally 1.6 M above the ground int he dance studio and we are suppsoed to send everyone of us across without touching tt line and above it. haha then i was assigned to be the last person and to do a .. handstand <-issit tt word? so i went off to practise tt thing.haha and see pple raising pple acorss the line and how pple dangerously jump down. sometimes.. find it hard to beleive tt pple put in some much efort for a game and to overcome their fears. find the courage in a team?hahs. yea i finally cannot stand it.. and i went down to help support pple over when the trainers said tt the way we used was too dangerous. yea then aft much discussion and trial and error.. we still used back the same method. Think this is the problem with my batch - thinking and worrying too much..little courage to take risks and face challenges with charm and gusto, in short po po ma ma.. haiz. Other factor could be tt of self-confidence. I mean..the jumping method will work if one is totally prepared for the landing and ready to react. If u are not confident of urself.. u won't have the agility to react tt quickly.on the other hand, if u are confident of urself... you formulate what to do beforehand and u CAN do it. Yea.. after more pple are over..we used the lying down and transporting method which was fast and efficient. The poblem arises when there was like 5 pple left and we exceed our goal of 1hr 20 and the jnrs came in.Felt as if we were wasting their time. Especially when they shouted "sec4s we have condifence in you!" and all the jia you jiayou..It is impossible to do the transport method as we do not have the strength.. not the pyramid mehtod cauz there's nothing to support the person crossing. Pple left: Dani, Chieh hwee, Charlene, HUizhong, ME. first..charl sat on Dani's shoulders and dani stood up.then with my shoulder as support, char stand up and cross her legs over to the other side. yea and i think 2 pple went across usign this method. Then it was left with Dani, chieh and me. Dani went over next. me and chieh held on to each other's shoulders in MA bU position. Dani climbed onto our shoulders, stepping onto our thighs and successfully went over <- we were overjoyed. i reckon chieh should go over since practised my handstand. I went to ma bu position - chieh stepped on my thighs..attempting to stand on my shoulders..if only i could have better balance.. everything would be fine..but it seems that chieh's feet were slipping off..and i think she's heavier than me..for some reason [mabbe lack of determination and thinking that there's a second try] i bent down.. chieh fell. Full of energy and zest to go for another round after rectifying the prob.. to my horror.bik wei came "reminding" others of my kidney prob. I tried to reassure everyone that HELLO i am NOT using my yao1.. it's the thighs and back.. not the yao1 and that i can go on. BUt they seem to be overwhelmed and guilty and the trainers insist that the method can't be used. Worst, they seem to be blaming my batchmate for not being concerned abt pple's health and stuff..felt real bad seeing pple's faces..they were all looking down..IT'S not anyone's fault..it's me..i who is so damn hiong and stuff.not others. When they went away and i was abt to reassure everyone again that I M OK and tt "stunt" is not doing any harm to me..they came back suddenly with a suggestion "change kailing over to tt side and 2 more pple should come over". I was hoping for a NO answer.. but having a look on most of the pple's face... it was as if a light of hope has shined on them. there is no need for me to hear the answer anymore. i walked over to the other side and i cried. Pple kept saying "it's not ur fault..it's not ur fault" but tt's not what im thinking. I have trust that even without me.. they will be able to complete the task..and it's not like when im at the other side.. i can't do a thing to help. it's juz that im sad cauz pple do not believe in me. I was seriously waiting for them to give me certain assurance that they have faith in me and believe that i can do it. NO. I know they are all concerned abt my health and stuff and i understand. Some how.. i dun like tt sympathy. BU4 yao4 ke3 lian2 wo. Wipe tt yan3 shen2 away! Yes i know it' s my pride working up. What hit me worse was that when i was at the other side.. offering to help.. pple gave me a "u betta not do it look"..having no faith in me again. HIt and Hurt AgAin and Again.. many a times i wanted to scream.. i din.. cauz i know they have good intentions. I juz walked away..nvm nvm. Haiz then i was very depressed since then..i want to be alone or with someone who understands me. but i guess i would have to complete tt task. Finally they sent charmaine over [last one] and the game is over.
After tt..dinner.. and it's IF WE HOLD ON TOGETHER. Quite scary. haha. We were told to divide ourselves into 2 grps and my grp was brought into C1-05.. the other into C1-04. It was pitch dark in the room and we were hurried like ducks into the room. SHouts Shouts SHout and for somereasons we were all down in leg raisers position. I DREAD leg raisers cauz they hurt my kidney.. but heng1 this leg raiser different from NP style.. as in pple can support u with their legs.. forming a 'A' shape.. so it's like.. i dun feel any strain on my back lo. did tt for abt 5min.. not knowing how long it will last. then someone came into the classrm and lied down beside me. i was told to sprint. Following the instructors along the corridor.. i sprint towards the canteen and turned into the sci block eco pond and signed my name on a paper and sprint back to C1-04. Finally i understood what's happening.. the longer u take to sprint.. the longer the pple will have to hold on to tt tiring position. During the sprint.. heard lots of scoldings.haha according to XW m.. she scolded "run like tortise" haha but she dunno it's me [makes a difference?slow=slow wad.. so what if it's me//] anw i heard things like "feel the suffering and pain??GO faster!! DUN WALK!!!SPRINT.. I KNOW THIS IS NOT UR BEST!!TOO SLOW~!"blahblah.. haha i bet they sae tt to everyone. Then in C1-04 ..i was in push up position.. for like.. 50 min or so.. wah piang.. tiring.. this one.. cannot support one..but got lots of rest time. The freaky part is.. pple beside me kept falling and collapsing.. 1 by one.. someone fainted and like almost cannot breathe.. someone is panting and fainting already but still requested to continue.. until alina went up to her and siad "as camp commandant i Forbid u to continue!".My.. see the amount of effort pple put in? u can call tt the climax of the day. Really.. i almost cried when i saw this scene. then that was my source of motivation..until i collapse.. i shall not slack/rest..
haha then aft tt.. can SLP liao. WAH.. slept until 7+ the next day leh. Think they took away alot of stuff and games away.. juz to let us slp. 1st thing.. PT!! had a jog around the sch.. 2 rounds. Then i saw teamates preparing to pitch.haha waved to them and stuff. then on the second round.. wanting to wave to them again .. saw janet m pulling Cheryl w out..i knew i was supposed to be out too.. then i left the line. yes then went for the 1st eva team pitch.yea..haha alot of funny stuff and.. gan1ga4 stuff happened la. then aft breakfast provided by zj ..sprint back for the next event - the blind run. we were blind folded.. told that there were tables as barriers in front of us. the person running blindfolded was supposed to shout HEYYYYYYY and the person at the other end..knowing her arrival muz shout STOP to prevent her from knocking into the tables. the others will stand at the side and protect the runner. I got knocked into .. 2 times.and my nose bridge still hurts. there was once.. this person shouted stop but the runner did not stop and when she stopped shouting HEY .. and aft 1 or 2 seconds.. we heard a loud BANG. BANG INTO THE TABLE SOUND!!! and everyone went :O . OUCH!!! haha apparrently it was a trainer..wanting to scare us. fine. hahah happy that i made it the 1st time.. somepple tried for 4 times.. knocking into everywhere... OUCh for them.
Then it was the LIFT ME UP game. 2 gymballs were netted together at the audi and we were supposed to pass them to the sciblock area and suspense them in the mid air. haha SMART that we spotted the pulleys and nylon strings.. got the idea instantly..how to raise the balls. We ere also supposed to cheer continously once the ball is in motion. yea so in the beginning.. i was in the middle pushing the ball up while cheering.. haha and for some weird reason.. i was always the 1st to start a cheer and pple would follow up. Aft a few moments.. pple comment that the pple outside weren't doing anything so we let them into the center and most of the sec 4s went outside to lead cheer. haha u can really see pple cheering their lungs out. my voice was hoarse and i was using all my energy to cheer lo. DUnno why..s till very happy and hyper. haha then i went upstairs to help with the tying of the rope and holding it up[oh.. haha think np peepz know how to utitlise their chang2 chu4.. haha u see all nP pple upstairs helping wif e tying..] Then they posted a challenge.. w/o e net.. and no one upstairs.. we are supposed to lift the balls up. Smart pple immediately thought of the idea of using trackpants as a net and using the pulley.. lift the balls up. hhahaha.. toopid florence.. irritating.. kept saying it will look like a bra. DIRTY. haha but this time.. we wanted the elects to try to lead.. so the sec 4s stood by and juz cheer. haha kept cheering the same pattern..quite funny..tt wu2 ani4 look on pple's face and "AGAIN?"look. hha then while running up and down the stairs.. suppsoed to cheer also.. haha then the guides kept looking over at this grp of siao lang runnign abt and cheering. hahha. yea.. was quite gekked tt the pple throwing the balls around weren't cheering alot.. haha yet quitre happy to see SOME reallt responding to our comments and cheering real hard. again.. it's abt attitude. haha then after like 2 hours... the trainers forbid us to cheer cauz it's like harmful to the voicebox.:)
Yea tt's the end of all activities. After clearing up and stuf.. we revealed our warm fuzzies and the CCC finally smiled :). hahha. Celebration!! the buffet..not my taste la.. so not very nice to me.. but we have ICECREAM!!!i picked the coffee one and we smeared it on chuwen. haha.. then someone took revenge on me!!! hahaha so fun. 3/11 has 6 councillors AGAIN for nxt year.. haha 3/11 03 rulz. ok anw.. we had a farewellf or mr lee. actaully i was suppsoed to sing a hokkien song.. then i din have much confidence in that.. especially aft all the shouting..will zou3 yin1 one.hhaa so with my lyrics.. the sec 4 batch sang the chinese version of "ai4pin1 cai2 hui4 ying2" haha u can see the look on everybody.. like "HUH?" and ^_-.. haha and the "wau lau" look. yea then aft tt we had a final debrief by alina and bik wei.. haha fianlly.. the angel side of them.. they reveals quite lots of secrets. yea.. then ms soon tokked to us and WOAH a PPT presentation of all the photos taken. Cool.. funny.. funckay./ hahah.
All in all.. lots of memories in this camp.. enjoyed it alot. learnt alot.. miss it alot. seriously.. i hope it can be longer. haha.. wadeva it is.. the lessons learnt will surely stay w me for a long time.
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03/12/2003
Thanks to the following pple who made me pull through council camp / have made my day.. esp. the 2nd half of the 2nd day
Sylvia - for the big tite hug. and wadeva u've mumbbled into my ears. haha i know health is important la.=)thanx for being there when i needed u
Hong Zhen - thanx for being veri sensitive. Great friend, hard to get.haha seem like u still dun have chance to tok to me yo?
Mich Fong - thanx for the constant encouragements and hugs..haha u made my day.
DAni - big thanx to this super buddy.. taking care of everyone.. haha
Pearlene and Huixuan: for supporting me during the pushups
Yuqin: supporting me during leg raisers.without u.. i'll die
Yup if i miss out anyone..sorri.. but juz wanna sae..with the passion and encouragement and juz the feeling tt the whole organisation is behind me.. i really found the energy to move on..aft 7 straight days of "camp".
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